Surreal Soundtrack

I find it strange that 2 of the most surreal moments of my life have involved the song 'Sussudio' by Phil Collins.

Firstly because, although I do like the song, I've never actively chosen to listen to it, but had only ever heard it from another source like the radio, TV or Dad's record collection. Secondly because of all the songs in the world it's possibly the most random to come across that often and isn't commonly played. Thirdly because... well, it's Sussudio by Phil Collins.

It's never really held any normal connotations in my head, simply because of the situation in which I first heard it- that being the first time I watched 'American Psycho', during which Patrick Bateman has sex with 2 prostitutes whilst listening to the song. But since then the scenarios in which i hear it have become stranger.

Surreal Moment No.1
The first occurred whilst in the car with my Dad. We were going to go pick up my brother Fozz from his mates' house, and dad turned round to me and said "Right; here's what we gonna do." He then pulled a Phil Collins CD out from the glove compartment, put it in the cars CD player, then chose track no.3. he then continued, "Just follow my lead", before cranking the car stereo to it's highest volume and pressing play. Instantly 'Sussudio' BLARED from the speakers, and I mean it was standing-next-to-the-largest-speaker-at-a-gig loud. I covered my ears and shouted "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" before suddenly hearing my Dad screaming the words along with Collins, trying to make himself heard over the din! I shouted some more times before getting his attention, and he paused it, looking at me as if there was nothing abnormal about what had just happened. "Dad, seriously, what JUST happened?!" "It's the only way to listen to that song." "What?! That makes no sense!" "Yes it does. Now shh" and with that Phil Collins began raping my ears again. Ok, that sentence probably needs some thinking over but i'll leave it for now. Dad continued screaming along with 'Sussudio' whilst i stared at him in complete and utter disbelief.

Surreal Moment No.2
The second one occurred when my younger sister Katie went to Norwich to get a tattoo at a place called 'Factotum'. It was on her foot, and Katie had been told this was quite a painful experience so had asked me and her friend Jodie to come along for support. As she sat in the chair she held onto my hand; when the tattooist began she practically pulled my arms off. to give you some idea of how much pain she was in; Katie NEVER swears- and I heard her swear more times in the hour it took to complete her tattoo than i ever had in her lifetime!

Whilst the tattooist was working music was being played from a stereo in the corner, and it was all 80's hits. Suddenly Katie let out another scream, and the following took place;
Katie: ARRGGGHHHH FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK!!! ['Sussudio' by Phil Collins begins playing on the stereo]... Wait...Amy, is that- is that Phil Collins?
Me:Er...yeah, it is, it's erm 'Sussudio', I think
Katie: The one from 'American Psycho'?
Me: That's the one missus.
Katie: ARGH OW OW OW OW OH FUCKING BLOODY FUCK, SHIT!! AMY!!
Me: Yeah, hun?
Katie: Sing it to me!
Me: I-wait, what?
Katie: Sing 'Sussudio'! Now!! please, it'll help!!
Me: I-
Katie: Do it!!
Me: [nervously clearing throat] Ahem...erm...
Katie: ARRRGGHHH-[she pulls me down, holding onto both my hands and practically breaking my wrist]
Me: (Quietly) 'There's a girl that's been on my mi-iind'
Katie: OWWW FUCKING SHIII-
Me: 'All the tii-ime, Su-Sussudio'
Katie: FUUUUUCKII-
Me: 'Oh-ohh-ohh'

And that's how Phil Collins became the official sponsor of my surreal lifestyle.
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