Him?... Really?

A recent conversation brought up the fact that I tend to have crushes on the most peculiar of people. I can't dispute this; it's pure fact. So instead I will spend time indulging in them whilst simultaneously explaining them as well as I can.

Woody

There's no easy way to explain having a crush on a fictional character that's never actually existed- especially one that wears cowhide waistcoats. All I can say is that as a young girl, Toy Story was, and still is, my favourite film of all time and my obsession with it runs a little deeeper than most Pixar enthusiasts. Woody's loyal, caring personality was made all the more affecting by the fact he's flawed with insecurities and jealousy, and with his pointed features he taps into my weird liking of lanky, uncoordinated men. He's one of the greatest fictional characters of the last century, and the fact that I STILL don't have a Woody doll, despite having asked for one every christmas and birthday since i was 6 years old genuinely pains me.
Plus, he's voiced by Tom Hanks. I mean, COME ON.

David Mitchell
David Mitchell is a prime example of how the more talented a man is, the more attractive I find him. He's not only hilarious, but an incredible writer/actor, and the fact that he is ridiculously intelligent only further fuels my lust. Yeah, sure, he's not the best looking guy in the world, but that doesn't really matter all that much to me, he seems genuine and like a real gentlmen. The best way to describe him is to say it's as if someone travelled back to around 1875, plucked him out of a crowd and then chucked him head first into the 21st century. His delightful awkwardness makes me swoon.

Dara O'Briain
All I can do to explain this one is to refer to a direct quote from myself, as to how important a sense of humour in a man is;
"A guy needs to be funny. Humour is the most important thing when it comes to me being attracted to a man. A guy could probably laugh me into bed, if he were funny enough".
Around 89% of all crushes I have had have been based purely on how much the bloke has made me laugh. Seriously.
Also, there's something strangely compelling about how big he is. That's not meant to sound as dirty as it does...but seriously, he's like a tank. A big, hilarious, sexy, Irish tank...

Brains
This guy taps into the whole 'intelligence is sexy' part of my libido. Brains was always there with another incredible invention or idea to make sure everything was F.A.B, and is the real hero behind Thunderbirds. Never seeking glory, only ever to help, he was the first real geek i ever laid eyes on, and since then, let's face it - there's been no turning back. Want to know where my love for the geekiest of men comes from? Look no further than the blue eyes, bow-tie wearing bespectacled stud by the name of Brains. Plus, he invented Thunderbird 2, which is like my dream vehicle. HE INVENTED THUNDERBIRD TWO. Nuff said.
We'll ignore that he's a puppet, though, yeah? YEAH.

Before anyone points it out, yes, I am aware that so far my list has consisted of two people who never actually existed, and two comedians. Shuddup.

Rupert Grint
Whilst some people may look at me with a raised eyebrow when I declare that the only man who could ever convince me marriage is a good idea is Rupert Grint ("What, that ginger guy from Harry Potter??"), I know that I am not alone in my love for someone who must, surely, be one of the most exciting acting talents to emerge in the last ten years. I'm not a fan of the Harry Potter films (NOTE: this doesn't mean that I hate them, just that I have no interest in them), but after having seen both Driving Lessons and Wild target, i can officially say that this guy is supremely talented. And an absolute FITTIE. I like that you never hear about his private life, and that in every interview he comes across as the only one who hasn't let it all go to his head. And he has amazing taste in music. *Insert wand based sexual innuendo here*

Gary Oldman
The fact of the matter is, I don't even feel like I should need to explain myself with this one. IT'S FUCKING GARY OLDMAN. If you don't have a crush on him there's something weird about YOU. I am so in love with this man that the laptop I'm currently typing this up on was christened in his name, and if you want to use my laptop you have to ask if you can 'have a go on Gary'. Yes. Yes, you may. But first it's my turn.
Ok, fine, if you REALLY need a reason behind why I love him so much; AIR. FORCE. ONE.
'Nuff said.

To be fair, if you look back on all the people I've taken a shine to, celebrity or not, none of them been particularly conventional, and have left people confused. All i can say is I've never really been one to adhere to the rules of convention, and I won't ever apologise for not fancying the men I'm supposed to, nor for fancying the men that I'm not

xXx