Burning Bright

Me: Ma, have you heard about that 'Burning Bright' film?
Mum: Yes i have, and i think it's appalling!
Me: I know I- wait, what? Don't you mean AMAZING?!?
Mum: NO!!! Now all those stupid Americans-
Me: BIT racist, mother-
Mum: -are gonna think (puts on terrible accent that sounds more welsh than anything) 'Oh man, all the tigers-
Me:-'all the tigers'?
Mum:-are gonna try and kill me and my family' and then they'll go round killing all the tigers!!
Me: Mum, there aren't any tigers in America!!!
Mum: Siegfried and Roy have tigers!!
Me: Yeah, but they're not gonna set them on people and be all 'Hey, shoot my tiger'!!
Mum: YES THEY WILL!!

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