Everyone who knows me also know i suck at maths- to a degree which is quite ridiculous. It took after-school sessions 3 times a week with my maths teacher, a tutor twice a week and doing 2 hours worth of work at home everyday for 2months in order for me to get a B at GCSE- this may seem like i was going over-board but the idea of not having having to ever do maths again was such an amazing thing it made me push myself harder than i ever had done before.
However- recently loads of things have been happening involving numbers; bank stuff, house stuff, bills stuff and all that malarke, which means that i have been thrust back into the world of numbers. When i say to people "I honestly think i have like dyslexia for maths" they tell me im being an idiot and there's no such thing- it's probably more likely that i'm a tad stupid. BUT i have looked it up, and there is such a thing as Mathematical disability- it's called Dyscalculia. Here's some information on it - i will write under neath why i know i must have it;
Dyscalculia:
"A genetically-linked learning disability which affects a person's ability to understand, remember, or manipulate numbers or number facts (e.g., the multiplication tables). The term is often used to refer specifically to the inability to perform arithmetic operations, but it is also defined by some educational professionals and cognitive psychologists as a more fundamental inability to conceptualize numbers as abstract concepts of comparative quantities (a deficit in "number sense"). Those who argue for this more constrained definition of dyscalculia sometimes prefer to use the technical term Arithmetic Difficulties (AD) to refer to calculation and number memory deficits."
Ok, so to start with my Mum struggles with numbers as much as i do, maybe even more, whereas my Dad is like bloody Stephen Hawking- he loves maths. So there's the genetic bit. The rest of it is perfectly true- it took me an entire week when i was younger to learn the 7x table- just the 7!!
"Dyscalculia occurs in people across the whole IQ range, and sufferers often, but not always, also have difficulties with time, measurement, and spatial reasoning"
Well that explains why i'm so damn clumsy and always bump into things- i say "I have no spatial awareness" about a million times a day.
"Current estimates suggest it may affect about 5% of the population"
Always knew i was special ^^
"In the way that dyslexia can be dealt with by using a slightly different approach to teaching, so can dyscalculia. However, dyscalculia is the lesser known of these learning disorders and so is often not recognized."
And that right there is why i had to do all the work i did at GCSE- i'm not blaming anyone but it would've been nice to know that people didn't just think i was a complete idiot, and think how much it would've helped me if they'd recognised it and taught me how to handle it. All i ever heard from my maths teacher was "You don't get it cos you don't listen or work hard enough". I HATED it
SYMPTOMS:
-Inability to comprehend financial planning or budgeting, sometimes even at a basic level; for example, estimating the cost of the items in a shopping basket or balancing a checkbook.
Yep
-Difficulty with multiplication-tables, and subtraction-tables, addition tables, division tables, mental arithmetic, etc.
7 x table
-May do fairly well in subjects such as science and geometry, which require logic rather than formulae, until a higher level requiring calculations is obtained
I was brilliant at science at GCSE level- i got an A in the chemistry part of my science GCSE, but when i took it at A-level, and there was a constant use of numbers i couldn't do it and got an E. It almost ruined my AS-Levels and chances of Uni
-Difficulty with conceptualizing time and judging the passing of time. May be chronically late
Anyone who knows me knows this- just the other day i was telling Alex i have absolutely no concept of time, and i'm always late
-Having particular difficulty mentally estimating the measurement of an object or distance (e.g., whether something is 10 or 20 feet (3 or 6 metres) away).
Seriously- if someone asks "how far away was it?" i have to physically show them- i can never say how far because i have no idea about lengths or anything
-Often unable to grasp and remember mathematical concepts, rules, formulae, and sequences.
Yep
-An inability to read a sequence of numbers, or transposing them when repeated, such as turning 56 into 65
Yep
-The condition may lead in extreme cases to a phobia or durable anxiety of mathematics and mathematical-numeric devices/coherence's
I haven't got a phobia, but the "durable anxiety" bit is spot on- Maths and numbers freak me out and upset me- i get really het up and upset if i have to do maths and stuff, it panics me
-Might have a well-developed sense of imagination due to this (possibly as cognitive compensation to mathematical-numeric deficits).
I have the world's biggest imagination. Again, if you know me you'll know this- i come up with the most ludicrous things and just let my mind run wild. That's a good thing though i spose ^^
i dunno if anyone else is going to find this interesting, but i really really do- everything about it makes sense. i just like that i have an answer now. i think i should get tested for it- it might help me out in the future or something if it's been clinically diagnosed. people might be a bit more understanding then
xXx
Saturday, 6 June 2009
Thursday, 4 June 2009
Exams, Muse Tickets and Shadow Spiders
Ok, so two things- No, wait three things-
1)The exam went fiiiiine so that's ok
2)I am shattered but i cannot nap AT ALL which is REALLY annoying
3)I am 45% sure i just saw a MASSIVE, and i mean seriously quite big, spider run across my wall. I say 45% because at the same time a stupid magpie flew past my window squawking so it could've been a shadow- it was going very very fast. which means, if it's actually a spider i'm scuppered-because it was massive. Damn Shadow spiders!!!
I'm writing this is the dark at the mo, because my curtains are closed and my light is off as i was trying, and failing dismally, to get some kip because i am VERY tired- a combination of getting to sleep at 2:30am, waking up at 7:30, sitting in a 2 hour exam, failing to get Muse tickets Pre-Sale tickets, crying my eyes out at an 'ER' documentary and revising in the library for over an hour has resulted in a me that's feeling ever so achey, fragile and kinda lonely :(
1)The exam went fiiiiine so that's ok
2)I am shattered but i cannot nap AT ALL which is REALLY annoying
3)I am 45% sure i just saw a MASSIVE, and i mean seriously quite big, spider run across my wall. I say 45% because at the same time a stupid magpie flew past my window squawking so it could've been a shadow- it was going very very fast. which means, if it's actually a spider i'm scuppered-because it was massive. Damn Shadow spiders!!!
I'm writing this is the dark at the mo, because my curtains are closed and my light is off as i was trying, and failing dismally, to get some kip because i am VERY tired- a combination of getting to sleep at 2:30am, waking up at 7:30, sitting in a 2 hour exam, failing to get Muse tickets Pre-Sale tickets, crying my eyes out at an 'ER' documentary and revising in the library for over an hour has resulted in a me that's feeling ever so achey, fragile and kinda lonely :(
VIRTUAL HUG ME BETTER EVERYONE!!!!
Sigh. There we go ^^
This blog is fairly basic. Alex is having some trouble blogging at the minute- he says he's worried about coming across as 'Boring', which is ridiculous cos I don't think i've ever heard a boring thing come out of that boy's mouth- anything he says either results in people laughing or going "NO WAI?!!" This is his blog- http://alibongo.tumblr.com/rss i suggest you go and read it and see for yourselves- no boringness there. Just a young man who occasionally dresses like a clown. AND there's a picture of him wearing clown make-up on there, but that's a different matter :P
so yeah. Frank'n'Stein here i come. after more attempted nappage i feel.
xXx
Wednesday, 3 June 2009
I Have a THEORY
Right-here's what i'm thinking.
Muse have just announced their European tour for the album 'The Resistance'- Tickets go on sale Friday 5th June. Because i'm signed up to the Muse fan mail list i got offered tickets in advance- BUT i'm not going to be buying tickets for this tour. Because i have a theory that, if it works out, would mean i get to see Muse at their peak. and if it doesn't work out, it'll mean i have to wait another bajillion years (ok, so it's only been three years since i last saw them, but equates, gig-wise, to a bajillion) before i see them.
My theory is thus- Muse are only going to be in the UK for 5 nights of their European tour. For a band that's renowned for it's fantastic live performances, only dedicating 5 nights of a pretty massive tour (take a look if you don't believe me) seems kinda odd. That is, until you think back to 2006, when they released 'Black Holes and Revelations;
and then performed at Reading and Leeds festival.
So i reckon what they're gonna do is be at Reading and Leeds 2010- the album, 'The Resistance' is being released in a few months time, roughly September time, unlike 'Black Holes and Revelations' which was released on 3 July in 2006- Muse then went on to play Reading. Because of the lateness of the release of 'The Resistance' i suspect Muse will be playing a BIG festival next year; normally people would say Glastonbury,(although their performance at Glastonbury 2004 i should imagine holds some horrible memories for all of them, particularly Dom Howard after his dad passed away during the set) but every Muse fan knows how much they ADORED playing Reading and Leeds- after the night of the Reading gig Matt Bellamy told NME magazine that he felt like "they'd finally made it". A band who's career has been going since 1998 only felt credible after playing Reading 2006- that's how much it meant to them. And that's why i think they'll go back again.
So i'm not gonna buy a ticket for 'The Resistance' Tour- i'm gonna save my money and then place my bets on Reading or Leeds.
And even if they don't go to Reading and Leeds-It's Reading and Leeds; Like it's gonna suck to go...
xXx
Muse have just announced their European tour for the album 'The Resistance'- Tickets go on sale Friday 5th June. Because i'm signed up to the Muse fan mail list i got offered tickets in advance- BUT i'm not going to be buying tickets for this tour. Because i have a theory that, if it works out, would mean i get to see Muse at their peak. and if it doesn't work out, it'll mean i have to wait another bajillion years (ok, so it's only been three years since i last saw them, but equates, gig-wise, to a bajillion) before i see them.
My theory is thus- Muse are only going to be in the UK for 5 nights of their European tour. For a band that's renowned for it's fantastic live performances, only dedicating 5 nights of a pretty massive tour (take a look if you don't believe me) seems kinda odd. That is, until you think back to 2006, when they released 'Black Holes and Revelations;
and then performed at Reading and Leeds festival.
So i reckon what they're gonna do is be at Reading and Leeds 2010- the album, 'The Resistance' is being released in a few months time, roughly September time, unlike 'Black Holes and Revelations' which was released on 3 July in 2006- Muse then went on to play Reading. Because of the lateness of the release of 'The Resistance' i suspect Muse will be playing a BIG festival next year; normally people would say Glastonbury,(although their performance at Glastonbury 2004 i should imagine holds some horrible memories for all of them, particularly Dom Howard after his dad passed away during the set) but every Muse fan knows how much they ADORED playing Reading and Leeds- after the night of the Reading gig Matt Bellamy told NME magazine that he felt like "they'd finally made it". A band who's career has been going since 1998 only felt credible after playing Reading 2006- that's how much it meant to them. And that's why i think they'll go back again.
So i'm not gonna buy a ticket for 'The Resistance' Tour- i'm gonna save my money and then place my bets on Reading or Leeds.
And even if they don't go to Reading and Leeds-It's Reading and Leeds; Like it's gonna suck to go...
xXx
Lion King makes it better.
Listening to 'The Lion King' soundtrack makes me ever so smiley ^^ except from the track "To die for". I'm sure you can imagine what part of the film that's from...i just skip over it, to avoid Disney induced tears of despair. Cor, they don't half know how to make you cry do Disney. But at the minute i'm listening to "King of Pride Rock", but i always skip forward to 3:18, cos that's when it gets good. My favourite's either "I just can't wait to be King" or "This Land"- which is AHAMAHZINK. so there- that's all you need to know
Aerobics again this aftarnaan, which was again fabbity fab fab- except the poor aerobics lady hurt her ankle. but other than that it was as exhausting as , if not more so than, last week. Yayness to getting fitteh!!I was red for ages, but i couldnae work out if it was because i was still all "Flah" or because i have slight sunburn- my arm hurt last night, so i assume it's sunburn :S great. Factor 30 is not for the Hardcore
I must seem ever so slightly obsessed with musicals to my housemates. I mean, i am, but like i listen to the soundtracks of my faves ALL THE TIME. Craziness. CRAZAE IN MY NAZAE. God i need to stop talking like an idiot- it's just cos im all het up about exams, i swear. Most of my mates back home needed their own 'Amy Dictionary' during A Levels, which included a 'Miaow-to-stress-level' Ratio at the back...Ok, i made that up, but that would be an awesome sauce thing to own
Right, im off to go swap essay papers with Cruden in order to learn. FUN.
xXx
Aerobics again this aftarnaan, which was again fabbity fab fab- except the poor aerobics lady hurt her ankle. but other than that it was as exhausting as , if not more so than, last week. Yayness to getting fitteh!!I was red for ages, but i couldnae work out if it was because i was still all "Flah" or because i have slight sunburn- my arm hurt last night, so i assume it's sunburn :S great. Factor 30 is not for the Hardcore
I must seem ever so slightly obsessed with musicals to my housemates. I mean, i am, but like i listen to the soundtracks of my faves ALL THE TIME. Craziness. CRAZAE IN MY NAZAE. God i need to stop talking like an idiot- it's just cos im all het up about exams, i swear. Most of my mates back home needed their own 'Amy Dictionary' during A Levels, which included a 'Miaow-to-stress-level' Ratio at the back...Ok, i made that up, but that would be an awesome sauce thing to own
Right, im off to go swap essay papers with Cruden in order to learn. FUN.
xXx
Boosting my ego with random scribblings
Over the past couple of months i've been randomly scribbling down little paragraphs of writage that just pop into my head- some of these random scribbles go on to become something, like a short story, or even an entire first chapter to a novel i'm still not entirely sure i'm writing. However, some of them have yet to go anywhere, but i'm still very proud of them, and know that i'll end up fitting them in somewhere.
Because i'm doing exams at the minute my confidence in my ability to write is in an all-time-non-existing-type-situation, and so reading through these little, er, 'literary snibbits' boosts my ego somewhat. when relaying this to my dad he said "Well, why don't you put them on that blog of yours? Surely that'd boost your confidence even more?"
And so, at the request of Pandy here are some of the 'snibbits'. Also i'm now in love with the word 'Snibbits'.
(All of the below, and technically everything above these brackets, was written by me, Amy, and haven't been seen before by anyone else, apart from MEIN EYES)
Reactions
‘Aint it funny the way people react to things differently? I’ve always considered reactions to be the best way of making out what a person truly is or at least have the potential to be. They can be hugely ironic too, given the right medium. For example the might of fundamental nature, turning our world, can inspire a man to find himself, stand up and stand out, gives an essence of supremacy and stability; whilst at the same time that world turning power can haunt a person, make them meek as they try to comprehend and drive their minds to nothing but shear lunacy. A lot can be said for naturally occurring power. It’s the same with love, really- the right amount of love can make a person better than they were. But you fall into the wrong kind of love and you’ll be several shades less of a man. It’ll change your face whilst the wind is blowing, and before you know it you look in a mirror and don’t recognise the ruin that’s cracked in front of you.
Homeward Bound
Suddenly none of it made sense anymore. Why I had left, why I was still leaving. The desperation in her voice shook me and accidentally knocked open my book to a page I didn’t realise was even there- the question of why? Why did I choose to stay away from the ones who needed me the most? What sense did it make, no matter how many happy times you have away from them they’ll never equate to the times you had with your loved ones; a funny occurrence away from them would be hysterical if only they were there to share it. A moment of sentimentality becomes wave upon wave of emotion as soon as they draw near. I’d made up my mind before I had even hung up the phone- I mean, like Dorothy said “There’s no place like home”, right?
The first thing I noticed was how quickly it had grown dark. The artificial daylight of the streetlamps coated everything in a bronze overtone and hid away the real colour of the night, and I realised that maybe standing in the middle of a suspiciously quiet road at – Damn, it was 11 already? When had that happened? Anyway, it wasn’t the best idea I’d ever had. I walked for about 10 minutes until I reached the high-street and started to look for signs of a bus shelter, or a train station, a taxi, anything- anything that would bring me closer to home, and away from the rambling drunks now stumbling toward me. I veered away from them, it wasn’t hard, ignoring their half-hearted attempts at roadside seduction – Mmm, classy- toward a takeaway outlet that, whilst to me looked dingy and in serious violation of every single health code, the drunks seemed to be flocking towards, as if it was some neon accented Mecca.
Something to be said
There’s something to be said for falling for the wrong person. For a start, it often involves wanting what you can’t have- a twisted reflex that lives within the best of us. When the object you lust for is simply an object, such as money or a car then the pain of not getting want you want has more to do with jealously than anything. When it’s a physical person, someone who you wish you could reach out and touch or kiss or hold either for the first or last time that’s when the pain becomes more than a shallow emotion and more of a physical affliction. Love makes us irrational, makes us believe in things that will never be, and even when everyone else around you is in utter disbelief that you have those feelings to start with to you it makes sense. Imagine how awful it is when the stupidity is held in the fact you’re not together, not that you love that person in the first place. Imagine how awful it would be if the only person you wanted to realise how amazing you would be together is the only person who doesn’t. Imagine finding someone who you believed to be the pinnacle of everything you wanted, and then being told you couldn’t have them. Then imagine being told that they’re not who you thought but not being able to pull yourself away.
I'm really proud of all of the above pieces. There's tons more, but they wouldn't make as much sense in this kind of singular paragraph situation- they need to find themselves a home amongst some of the other drivel that falls out of my mind ^^ Maybe when they've found that home i'll show it on here
xXx
Because i'm doing exams at the minute my confidence in my ability to write is in an all-time-non-existing-type-situation, and so reading through these little, er, 'literary snibbits' boosts my ego somewhat. when relaying this to my dad he said "Well, why don't you put them on that blog of yours? Surely that'd boost your confidence even more?"
And so, at the request of Pandy here are some of the 'snibbits'. Also i'm now in love with the word 'Snibbits'.
(All of the below, and technically everything above these brackets, was written by me, Amy, and haven't been seen before by anyone else, apart from MEIN EYES)
Reactions
‘Aint it funny the way people react to things differently? I’ve always considered reactions to be the best way of making out what a person truly is or at least have the potential to be. They can be hugely ironic too, given the right medium. For example the might of fundamental nature, turning our world, can inspire a man to find himself, stand up and stand out, gives an essence of supremacy and stability; whilst at the same time that world turning power can haunt a person, make them meek as they try to comprehend and drive their minds to nothing but shear lunacy. A lot can be said for naturally occurring power. It’s the same with love, really- the right amount of love can make a person better than they were. But you fall into the wrong kind of love and you’ll be several shades less of a man. It’ll change your face whilst the wind is blowing, and before you know it you look in a mirror and don’t recognise the ruin that’s cracked in front of you.
Homeward Bound
Suddenly none of it made sense anymore. Why I had left, why I was still leaving. The desperation in her voice shook me and accidentally knocked open my book to a page I didn’t realise was even there- the question of why? Why did I choose to stay away from the ones who needed me the most? What sense did it make, no matter how many happy times you have away from them they’ll never equate to the times you had with your loved ones; a funny occurrence away from them would be hysterical if only they were there to share it. A moment of sentimentality becomes wave upon wave of emotion as soon as they draw near. I’d made up my mind before I had even hung up the phone- I mean, like Dorothy said “There’s no place like home”, right?
The first thing I noticed was how quickly it had grown dark. The artificial daylight of the streetlamps coated everything in a bronze overtone and hid away the real colour of the night, and I realised that maybe standing in the middle of a suspiciously quiet road at – Damn, it was 11 already? When had that happened? Anyway, it wasn’t the best idea I’d ever had. I walked for about 10 minutes until I reached the high-street and started to look for signs of a bus shelter, or a train station, a taxi, anything- anything that would bring me closer to home, and away from the rambling drunks now stumbling toward me. I veered away from them, it wasn’t hard, ignoring their half-hearted attempts at roadside seduction – Mmm, classy- toward a takeaway outlet that, whilst to me looked dingy and in serious violation of every single health code, the drunks seemed to be flocking towards, as if it was some neon accented Mecca.
Something to be said
There’s something to be said for falling for the wrong person. For a start, it often involves wanting what you can’t have- a twisted reflex that lives within the best of us. When the object you lust for is simply an object, such as money or a car then the pain of not getting want you want has more to do with jealously than anything. When it’s a physical person, someone who you wish you could reach out and touch or kiss or hold either for the first or last time that’s when the pain becomes more than a shallow emotion and more of a physical affliction. Love makes us irrational, makes us believe in things that will never be, and even when everyone else around you is in utter disbelief that you have those feelings to start with to you it makes sense. Imagine how awful it is when the stupidity is held in the fact you’re not together, not that you love that person in the first place. Imagine how awful it would be if the only person you wanted to realise how amazing you would be together is the only person who doesn’t. Imagine finding someone who you believed to be the pinnacle of everything you wanted, and then being told you couldn’t have them. Then imagine being told that they’re not who you thought but not being able to pull yourself away.
I'm really proud of all of the above pieces. There's tons more, but they wouldn't make as much sense in this kind of singular paragraph situation- they need to find themselves a home amongst some of the other drivel that falls out of my mind ^^ Maybe when they've found that home i'll show it on here
xXx
Monday, 1 June 2009
Nothingness
So apparently i've become an expert in the art of tight destruction. i wouldn't mind so much, if it wasn't for the fact a pair of 2 cost £6 a pack- that's money not well spent. example- i bought these tights less than 2 weeks ago- they are both kaput. Which means i now have to buy more. which is really great.
I've come with an idea of what to do with all the pictures and stuff i have in my room and on my pin board- i was gonna buy a photo album, but i've decided instead to buy like a big ol' plain-paged book, and turn it into like a uni scrapbook- i obviously wont fill it with all the stuff i've gotten this year, but i'll keep it as like a documenty type thing for my whole uni life. well, i'll attempt to, i'll do it really enthusiastically for about the first week of holiday, and then i'll become obsessed with some useless television show, that'll end up taking over my summer and i'll come back to Canters in september and people will say "So what'd you get up to over summer?" and i will say "Somerfield"
OH YEAH!!!I almost forgotted about that- SOMERFIELD WANT ME BACK!! SO HAPPY!!I'LL HAVE MONS!!BEACOUP DE MONS!!
(Do you know what that is my friends? Karma. My Karma is finally working itself out. Hey, maybe i'll get a reversal of the last 19 years worth and end up with a flying car that travels through time!...No, wait...That's Back to the Future. Sorry ^^ well, the poster IS right infront of me)
When Kage said she had good news for me and then told me that i actually did a little jump in the air and squealed slightly, shouting "YAYAYAY!!"- i gave the people outside the laundrette quite a turn. they probably thought i had esploded
The other day, saturday, was pretty awesome sauce- here are 10 things that sum up saturday perfectly (because i'm lazy and cannae be bothered to describe everything)
1) Sunnilicious perfect weather
2) Lyppeat Crew Rule
3) Ribena
4) Getting stuck in a bush whilst retrieving a ball (read into that what you will)
5) "Simon Cowell MUST be high"
6) Tourettes Documentary Drinking Game
7) #"I'm a Kniiiiife. Knifin' aroouuund. Cutcutcutcutcutcutcutcutcutcutcut#
8) DIVERSITY FTW!!!
9) Venue
10) I watch 'The Office' for the first time EVER. with chinese subtitles.
it was grand.
right im off to chillax
xXx
I've come with an idea of what to do with all the pictures and stuff i have in my room and on my pin board- i was gonna buy a photo album, but i've decided instead to buy like a big ol' plain-paged book, and turn it into like a uni scrapbook- i obviously wont fill it with all the stuff i've gotten this year, but i'll keep it as like a documenty type thing for my whole uni life. well, i'll attempt to, i'll do it really enthusiastically for about the first week of holiday, and then i'll become obsessed with some useless television show, that'll end up taking over my summer and i'll come back to Canters in september and people will say "So what'd you get up to over summer?" and i will say "Somerfield"
OH YEAH!!!I almost forgotted about that- SOMERFIELD WANT ME BACK!! SO HAPPY!!I'LL HAVE MONS!!BEACOUP DE MONS!!
(Do you know what that is my friends? Karma. My Karma is finally working itself out. Hey, maybe i'll get a reversal of the last 19 years worth and end up with a flying car that travels through time!...No, wait...That's Back to the Future. Sorry ^^ well, the poster IS right infront of me)
When Kage said she had good news for me and then told me that i actually did a little jump in the air and squealed slightly, shouting "YAYAYAY!!"- i gave the people outside the laundrette quite a turn. they probably thought i had esploded
The other day, saturday, was pretty awesome sauce- here are 10 things that sum up saturday perfectly (because i'm lazy and cannae be bothered to describe everything)
1) Sunnilicious perfect weather
2) Lyppeat Crew Rule
3) Ribena
4) Getting stuck in a bush whilst retrieving a ball (read into that what you will)
5) "Simon Cowell MUST be high"
6) Tourettes Documentary Drinking Game
7) #"I'm a Kniiiiife. Knifin' aroouuund. Cutcutcutcutcutcutcutcutcutcutcut#
8) DIVERSITY FTW!!!
9) Venue
10) I watch 'The Office' for the first time EVER. with chinese subtitles.
it was grand.
right im off to chillax
xXx
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